Patty Farmer: 00:00:00

Hello, everyone, and welcome to this week's episode of the Marketing Media & Money podcast. And I am really excited today, we're talking about a topic that a lot of times we don't want to talk about. As a matter of fact, we so don't want to talk about it, we don't even talk about it to ourselves. Right? So I think that's kind of one of those things, right? We kind of pretend like it's not there. So what we're going to talk about is overwhelmed, overjoyed, and how we let go of the must do everything mentality. And I think that, you know, as women specifically, we struggle with that a lot. And we don't talk about it, because we think everybody else seems like especially on social that they all got their stuff together, right? And it's like, oh, my gosh, it must just be me. And the reality is, it's pretty much almost epidemic, really. So we're going to talk about that today. And our guest today is going to share some real insights about that with you. And I'll tell you a little bit of story. And once I introduced her about how great she did that with me. So let me tell you a little bit. So Mary Barnett, known as a mobile Mary is a season digital marketing expert. And in 1980, he founded another brilliant idea, Inc, a certified small and women owned marketing firm. Her mission is to assist successful yet overwhelmed business owners to attract their ideal customer with ease and grace. She streamlines team efficiency lists building customer loyalty and profitability. So they can focus on impacting the world with what they uniquely provide, instead of having to do all the things that they don't want to do or have time to do, so that their ideal customer can find and hire them to do what they do best. So Mary, thank you so much for being here with me today.

Mary Barnett: 00:01:47

You are so welcome. Thank you so much for having me on your show. It's always so fun to be in your presence. So thank you.

Patty Farmer: 00:01:54

Oh, that is so fun. I haven't known Mary very long. It's really kind of funny that you know how sometimes you just meet somebody, you just know, they're going to be in your life forever. And then you find that you've been in the same places different things happen. So let me tell you that Mary and I, like we met at a conference, we went to pod fest, and we met over dinner, we haven't be sitting next to each other at a small intimate dinner that we were having where we both knew a lot of the other people, but we had not met in person. And we ended up

Mary Barnett: 00:02:26

We had met in a virtual mastermind before. So like we were on the same zoom call or something in the past.

Patty Farmer: 00:02:33

Yeah, that's right. Oh, yeah, that's right.

Mary Barnett: 00:02:35

Yeah. So we knew who actually there.

Patty Farmer: 00:02:38

I don't think I actually really put that together right then until after we started talking, then we kind of put it together. Yeah, that's, here's what I do remember that? It's good thing. You were a few minutes late to that, because I got a few minutes to talk to everybody else. Because once you sat down, you and I were like, we were so leaned in that everybody kept saying to us, like, are you guys going to talk to anybody else besides each other? We were like, man, we have so much to say literally starting with the name of her company. Like another brilliant idea, Inc, I remember telling her Oh, my gosh, I wish I would have thought of that first because that was such a brilliant idea. Right? You know, and I loved it. I loved it. And so much so well, I just I just remember you and I being like so in sync. And then every conversation we have had after that has just been amazing and more amazing. And you're so funny and brilliant. And it looks on everything's happening. You have no idea that

Mary Barnett: 00:03:35

I felt like we are sisters from a different Mr. So I think it's awesome. And we actually might be in the same place in a completely different country next week together. Which is why we absolutely well,

Patty Farmer: 00:03:46

I know, it's not like crazy, I really think that I have to tell you if we can make it so that we get together there even if it's like on our like, how great will that be? I feel like well, I assume something live just for there. That's 100% of What's the odds of that happening? I have to tell you, so here's the thing. So obviously, I'm in marketing, obviously you're on the marketing media money podcast, right? And you've heard me in you heard me introduce her as mobile Mary when she talks about and her business really is texting, right, you know, text marketing, and she is a genius. You know, totally brilliant at it. And we will kinda put some of that in there because you definitely want to know about that, as well. But I feel like today I want to really kind of go a little bit deeper, because I think we all have passion projects, right? We all have a project that you know, it's either in our gut or like I like to say I get down votes and you maybe you get text right and you know, well as whatever the case is of something that you know, we just really feel like we need to do and it will usually in some way, even though it's a passion project, tie in some way to Do we actually do what our calling is? Right? Right? No. So I feel like your book. And what we're going to talk about today does, in a way tie back to business in the sense that these are all things that we deal with in our business every single day, but are not the things that we always get on and share. I think that we live in a world where we're all trying to be more vulnerable and authentic. Not that we weren't. But we're sharing more vulnerability. Right, right, sharing it a little bit more. So with that said, the name of your book is Hello, God, it's me, Martha, a 31 day journey from overwhelmed, overjoyed. So let's get to start with what was your inspiration behind that book?

Mary Barnett: 00:05:49

Sure. Oh, thank you so much. And you're right, like you, as you were saying, you know, seeing, of course, like I do help businesses that are overwhelmed, right, they are so busy, like juggling all the balls spinning all the plates that they just, they can attract the businesses to them, because they're just so overwhelmed with all doing all the things. So that's part of our services. And this book, I also call the download because I feel like it was it was divinely downloaded to me. And this book does apply to people with and without faith, but it is definitely a faith based journal. And the inspiration is that my name is Mary. And I was actually named after the big guys mom. No pressure for you know, a young girl. But in the in the Bible, there's a story about Mary and Martha and it was actually different Mary, but they were sisters. And most likely on everyday basis. They were working in the kitchen as all women did back then serving, cooking, cleaning, like good stuff. But there was a time when Jesus what are their best friends came to visit. And so they were throwing a party on Mary, instead of helping her sister in the kitchen, literally sat down at the feet of Jesus to like, soak in all the knowledge, the wisdom love the joy that he was providing is he does rady any of that right. And Martha got kind of ticked off and in the Bible and actually said, she said, Hey, Jesus, you know, can you send Mary back to the kitchen? Like, come on, like that ever helped me I'm throwing a party here. And he said, Oh, Martha, you know, he's like, then yeah, so just wait, wait, Mary chose the better part. Meaning now I want you are designed as women to literally take a break, relax, pick those moments where you're gonna miss an opportunity if you don't take advantage of it and relax and rest in Me. And so I was all my life. I feel like I was Miss named I should have been named Martha because that's my personality. I am a go getter do or be or do. I'm not to be erasers. I'm a doer. And if something needs to get done, give it to me. Because I'm going to boom, boom, boom, I've got the list. I've got the context. I've got the resource. I'll pull people together. I'm just I'm always like that doer. Right. And I've been in business 35 years. And I'm only 36. I don't know if this video is going to be shared. Is this audio or only video? It's video. Oh, yeah. So people are now going to pause for his 30 save. So you only live like, Oh, yours while you are my new best friend, obviously. But usually when I'm on stage, I pause for laughter because you know, I'm not 36 Anyways. So I literally like five years ago, started this book. And I and as a marketer, as you can relate to this ad before I even wrote it, I made a poster of that that's sitting right there next to my door, I made a poster to promote this book that I hadn't even written yet for market research. I put it up at this event to see if anyone would react to it. It was just part of my display. And I'm like, Oh, if you're interested, I'll you know, text into this number. I'll send whoever. And literally I heard crickets, maybe a couple of people were like, Oh, that's interesting posters. Really bored, by the way. Anyways, but, but I was like, Well, okay, well, maybe this isn't a thing. So five years go by, I have a variety of health issues. I'm, I'm becoming more and more overwhelmed with all the doctor visits and all the things and I had two major surgeries last summer. And literally, God kept smacking me and saying, finish the book. Finish the book, right? I kept getting that like strong. You know, and since I was saying this was audio only air quotes, resting, which is really hard for us type A personalities. Like when you tell me I have to rest It's like he might as well be sensing me. Like, like, I'm on timeout. What? I can't do anything. So I literally was like, Well, I'm supposed to be resting. I guess Writing a book is a good thing resting right. I mean, that's what you do. Right? And you're resting. I'm not running around. Anyways, so literally within like, two months, I had finished the book. It was like boom, done. And I was like, Oh my gosh, Lord, what the heck like what am I supposed to do with this right? And I remember having again another overwhelmed breakdown on like massage table, like frying or whatever and I Hurt clear as day. You know, there's other women in the Bible. And I was like, oh, like I hadn't even published this darn book yet, or journal or whatever you wanna call it. And I was already getting ideas for Hello, God, it's me, Ruth. Hello, God, it's me, asked her, you know, stories of women who are courageous and loyal and all the things that, you know, God is always focused on in the Bible, women. I mean, literally, like, it's nuts, like he came to the women first and share who he was. The women were always the ones, you know, doing everything. And he relied on them so much, because the values women, and he wants the best for us. So anyways, I'll let you ask more questions. I'm like rambling, but it was literally like this supernatural download. It's not really tied to my business, except for the fact that I work with overwhelmed business owners. And I'm always trying to provide more joy to them, one by taking things off their plate. But also, just sometimes you just need a good laugh. And if that's my comic relief is my only service then I'm happy to provide it.

Patty Farmer: 00:11:07

I love that. And I think I shared this with you that day when you told me that, but like, my name is Mary to write you know, so like, literally, my name is Patricia, Mary, Katherine. Patricia, Mary, Katherine only. And so I know, right? And dialed, right. And so I feel like I really resonated when you shared that I resonated with that when you shared that story. And yet, I do see how it does tie back to our businesses. Right? Right. Because I feel like you know, what do they say like, if you want something done, ask a woman, right? You no matter how busy we are, we're going to, like, get it done. And I'm that person to snap, snap, that's me, you know, I'm gonna manifest or like, get it done. That's just like who I am. And I don't even think anything of it. Although normally for me what happens, which is what I love about this, is because when that happens to me, I will be able to do it. And then maybe I'm going to say, like, once or twice a year, like I hit a wall, right? You know, I'll hit a wall. I remember having conversations with my husband and I would say, You know what, I am so busy. I don't even have time to eat or go to the bathroom. Like, I hit a wall. And then I kinda sorta like what you said on the massage table. I kind of have a little bit of a break down moment. Right, you know? And, and then I'm literally like, okay, Patti, like, you know, get put your, you know, big girl panties. Yes, they pulled through another big girl panties. Yeah, and I fix it, and then I look at it, and then I fix it. And, and then I think, Oh, I'm never letting that happen again. And then he does, like, you know, it just seems like it does again in another year. Right? Yeah, that is because we do so we do so many things. Because we always want to be of service, right? Because he may always want to be of service. And that is, that is the thing. So that's what I love and why I wanted you on the podcast is like, yes, we could have actually had a whole podcast, and maybe we will, where we just really talk about text message marketing, and what that can do for your business and how that can free up your time. And all of that. I mean, it does kind of go with marketing as well. And we all kind of have that. So for those of you that are listening, thinking, Oh, is she just going to talk about this book? No, we're not. But we go, we kind of want to set the context for you of exactly how that happened. So and

Mary Barnett: 00:13:12

Also, and also, I think, as business owners, we don't give ourselves a break. And I think that was the message that kept coming through is that like, you and I are so similar. And my husband calls it a light switch, I'm either on or off, right? And you see the light bulb right there. And, you know, another brilliant idea is all about the lipo, right. And I don't know how to self regulate, because I just want to I, as you said, come from a place of service, and I want to over deliver over deliver over deliver and then I get burnout. And they you know, in that in the plane when you you know, when you they do the little safety instructions, and they say if something drops down from the ceiling, you have to put it on yourself first and then help others. And was women were like, No, we have to put it on our kids first. What did you know? That's so selfish? No, because if you're dead, you can help them. Right. I mean, comes down bottom line. And if we're worn out, falling face first under the bed every night. We're not serving anyone, as I said, like in the preface of this journal, you know, I don't know who, who and why we are like this. I mean, it's the way we are designed, obviously. But it's like we feel like we're just not enough. If we're not doing all the things if we're not making everybody happy if we're not showing up and being Pinterest perfect and all these things and that's such a lie. Like I don't know why we have this like built in like, self deprecating, like, oh my gosh, we don't make everything perfect all the time that we're not good women or I don't know. And it's this I just really wanted to help women recognize those Martha moments when they're like, oh my gosh, girl, you can choose to say no and it's okay. So they can say no to their merry moments. What?

Patty Farmer: 00:14:55

And it's a whole sentence too. I always like to say no is a complete sentence. Yes, yeah, it sounds Nice for me, it's yes, it's no or no, not now, and I'm totally okay with that. Right, you know, and sometimes you have to do it. But I feel like one of the things several years ago, when I actually started working on a little bit more inner work, and really trying to really understand why I kept doing that, right. And here's the thing. As business owners, both of us think about what we do for a living, I mean, I know that, like, we're telling people, we're going to help you, we're going to help you to do this. So you can, like I know, I tell people all the time, like, I'm going to help you to design your business in a way that we design the lifestyle you want to live, and then I'm gonna help you build a business that supports that. Right? And I'm gonna say that 99% of the time, that is me in my life, but there's that 1% of the time where I take on too much. I said, Yes, too many times. And I should have said, No, not now. And I didn't. And then I get into this space that we're talking about right now. In Dan, I feel like a fraud like, hey, people hire me, for me to help them and like, you're Why am I allowing this to happen to me? And so I've had to learn to be really vulnerable and authentic and say, Listen, I get it, because I do it too. Right. Right. You know, I do it too. And so So I think that is what is really important to be able to say yes, we get it we we understand. And I think that women that really and men too. But if we really want to serve, that's why sometimes we we do it. So I feel like I feel like in your book when you outlined that 31 day plan. Yeah, like which I which I love, I love. So could you share, like, so we'll get back here that you share and key strategy. Like I feel like we're on target, right? We're gonna talk about strategy, can you share a key strategy that helps transform from feeling overwhelmed to feeling overjoyed?

Mary Barnett: 00:16:50

Sure. Well, the way I do it in the book is I broke it down into days. So each day is like a two page spread. And you start off, there's a little Bible verse that ties to the theme of the day. And this one is I just can't do this anymore. Right, you just sometimes reach the end of your rope, right? And then I have all insight and a journal prompt, that basically helps you kind of think through what the topic is of the day. And so as you're processing it, I actually created these doodles on the right side with AI. So I tried to embody the theme of the day, right. But because again, we're all Martha's, and you said something to you, I want to make sure I swing back to because I think a lot of times we say, well, you know, we've done something once we should be transformed already. And my husband even said to me, you know, you of course is my, my, my grounding rod. He said, Well, do you really feel it's okay to publish his book when you're not always a Mary? Like you, your your you go back to be a Martha all the time. Like, I go? Yes, that's the thing. Like we constantly like, feel like we need to pick up our you know, our struggle and keep going when we're not supposed to, we're supposed to lay it down, right. And so we have to keep coming back to go through it again. And that's just because we're humans, right? We're flawed. We, and it's okay, right. So anyway, so I created the, the AI. But then because we are Martha's who keep going back to it, I created a little checklist. So there's actually a little gratitude place because it is proven scientifically that if we're coming into place, being Sydney in a place of gratitude, we're more positive minded. Like we literally will think of solutions better when we're sitting in gratitude. And so I put that in there. But the checklists are things like I drink water today. Right? Because God wants us to be they will he wants the best for us, period. But he you know, there's things he wants what's best for us, which is one stay hydrated. I actually heard another statistic that a lot of times when we procrastinate, it isn't that we're lazy. It's that we're dehydrated. Our body literally will put things off if we're thirsty which is a weird concept. You got

Patty Farmer: 00:19:05

so much better well first of all I don't feel like I'm I would never use lazy in any time in any way in any shame when I will be describing myself however I do like dehydrated so much better as a word not to be dehydrated by but I get that because I actually don't even I know people are blown away when I say this but I don't like the taste of water. Oh, I don't and so it is a struggle.

Mary Barnett: 00:19:30

Do you squeeze every day like lead? No her I don't so I'm in because

Patty Farmer: 00:19:34

I actually have a food intolerance to women to this loved one that one second I just share two things but no other than I put cucumber and I put fruit and okay you know mint sometimes but I cannot drink water by itself. Okay. And so I had to learn how to drink more water. So you're not alone. It's a conscious decision

Mary Barnett: 00:19:57

Yeah, yeah. My mother in law hated water too. But and so she was always having those issues with getting we're getting real errors for women, urinary tract infections and you don't drink enough water. That's the thing you know. So that's so I'm glad you're learning how to drink more water anyways. So that's like one of the checklist items is I drink water today I moved my body today like even if you're just like, Okay, I wear a smartwatch Apple Watch. And it literally tells me time to stand up, right? And I dissonance I'm so busy. I'll be honest with you, this is what I do. I lift my arm this, right, my watch that I'm standing up is that pathetic. And I even have a standing desk. So I can literally, you know, push a button and it raises up and I'm I'm so busy. I just do that. That is not self care. Mary Barnett like what that. And so it's like, this reminder for me is like live your damn body, like get up and do a little dance, take five minutes to go walk around the house or go outside and breathe in some air like come on, man. Like so this is literally I wrote this book for me to get less to get more joy in my life. And then it's I grew encouraged a friend today, which you and I that it was I feel like one of our things together like encouraging us like maybe we'll do a retreat someday together. Maybe we won't, I don't know, just teasing it out there. And then the last is, you know, sharing resentment. So this was also because I'm a marketer, I put all kinds of little marketing things. So here's a fun thing. If anyone is writing a book, and you create some kind of image or suddenly you want people to share, embed your website in it. So in each of my AI images, I put the website Hello God that today. So if anyone ever shared that image that they doodled, because it's a you know, doodling helps you kind of focus or coloring it. And when they share it, it'll actually have a little, you know, subconscious website.

Patty Farmer: 00:21:45

So I'll see because you are American or too so no, I think that that is, I think that is beautiful. I love that, you know, dancing is the thing that I do too, because I feel like when I have to get up when my watch tells me the same thing. And so usually what'll happen is I use that time to go get more water, right? That's my waters right here, like my waters idea. And I'll get up water and I'll dance out there to get it. You may not know this about me, this probably doesn't have anything we're talking about. But I always like to think we're having a conversation and everybody gets to be a part of conversation. Love it. For me. I've actually won awards for dancing, like dancing is like my jam. I hate to exercise, but I love to dance. And so really, when I I just crank up the music and and then just answer to kind of gets my energy up to write and the writer says my energy gets up. And then you know, I'll dance and then you know, I'll sit back down and be like, Okay, so what's next? Right, you know, that

Mary Barnett: 00:22:36

I'm sorry? pause for a moment. What kind of Valence did you do? I would think that inquiry want minds want to know,

Patty Farmer: 00:22:44

I mostly do line dancing. I mostly do line dancing. I live in Texas, you know, so I could I can push push with the best of them. And my cotton is pretty good, too. But no, I really love to dance. So that's really been for me, as

Mary Barnett: 00:22:59

I was thinking dancing with this. I was thinking Dancing with the Stars. So that's I'm glad to Utah

Patty Farmer: 00:23:04

And yeah, but it's fun. And so like, you know, like, given your exercise I have, I literally have those steps that people you know, step up, step down on like, oh, I can't do that, that is so boring. But if I crank the music, I have them around the room where my gym is. And literally when I start dancing, I'm stepping up and stepping down and over here. So I use them and I incorporate them in that dance moves. And stuff. That's an I I know, that's like the funnest way to do it. Because if I don't do that, or I'm not walking my puppies, like literally, I would be so much worse at taking the time to make my body blue. Right, you know, so rice does it for us. So pick something that you like, it doesn't have to be that you get on a you know, treadmill.

Mary Barnett: 00:23:46

Yeah, boring. Yeah, I know, I like like going for a walk. And like, I try to find something like, even like a weed in a crack of a sidewalk as a little flower on it. Like I tried to find those little things. So that's like my motivation to go out walking, or I'll see like a little hummingbird or a butterfly or something outside take a picture of it. I know that it's goofy, but I just like oh, it gives me like a little incentive. And then of course I'm in marketing so I shared on my story like oh, you know, or I'll I'll share my feet walking along the sidewalk and then or with my dog little puppy dog in front of me. And so it's just for me like an excuse to enjoy the outdoors or enjoy movement because I think you know, we need to take care of ourselves you know, so hydrating living your body. These are things that will make us feel better longer. So we can we have more time to have an impact on the world because isn't that really what we're put here for is to make the world a better place and we found it. So

Patty Farmer: 00:24:44

I agree and I think that incorporating these things into our business makes sense right? You know, it makes sense and whenever we can do that I think that works you know people know me like for me like you'll see me and you know I have my puppies like my puppies really You know, my kids, none of my six daughters, but none of my kids live where I live, so I don't get to go over and, and see them when I do travel to see them. I do. But the rest of the time my puppies are our it and so being able to go outside I think I read some one time that said that if you stand with your feet in the grass, it's grounding. Yes. For you and stuff. And so I always tried to say, Oh, yes, I need to try to do that every day. So if I breathe, and I dance a little, and I go stand in the grass, and, and I do those things. I feel like check like, right, you know, check. Okay,

Mary Barnett: 00:25:31

As soon as reminding me so there's a new phrase now. And again, I always say, Young kids these days, you know, selling an old woman. My daughter, actually just in five, remember, you're only 3736 36 businesses 35. Yeah. Thank you for reminding. My daughter said something like just in conversation. She says, Oh, they need to touch grass. And I was like, Oh my gosh, that's like what you're just saying is being grounded. I putting your feet and grasses connects you with the energy, right? And that is now a phrase that means I get real. She really needs to touch grass. And I'm like, okay, that's kind of cool.

Patty Farmer: 00:26:10

So it's kind of cool. Because sometimes then we say them, and they our kids think we're cool.

Mary Barnett: 00:26:14

Or I'm just saying, I throw that in there. Just stop trying to be get.

Patty Farmer: 00:26:19

Exactly. Okay, so I noticed that one of the things that you talk about, which I really, really resonate with is the power of the pause, right, you know, the power of the pause. And, man, it's like, kind of remind you reminds me of, even though I'm not really into cliches, I love quotes, but really not into crochets. But the whole, like, you know, the two most important days that you know, the DS, like the day you're born, the day you die, but what happens in between why? Right? Yeah, the why? Right, the dash, right, you know, so really, the pause there really is important. You know, as a speaker, we've learned as speakers, you know, when to pause, right, you know, in marketing, you know, I've really learned when to pause. But I really feel like there's a lot of power in that pause. And so for you, I really feel like, you know, in this topic, where does the power of the pause work for you?

Mary Barnett: 00:27:13

Well, I think that when we then also something that kids say, you know, take a beat, right, we take a beat,

Patty Farmer: 00:27:20

And cool on this part is so cool. I know,

Mary Barnett: 00:27:23

Right? So irrelevant. So when you take a pause, or take a beat, or touch grass, you're taking a moment to give your brain a chance to resect. And sometimes your most brilliant ideas come when you're not focusing on them. So like in the shower, most people find that they've come up with the most brilliant ideas, because they're not focusing on trying to come up with them. Right. And so when you are taking a pause, beat, grass, all those things, taking a shower, you're allowing yourself to become more creative, more invigorated, and then you can go back to what you were doing with much more energy and a fresh perspective. So I think when we're powering through and just doing doing doing, doing get checking off all the lists and scratching off things as your to do list, you're not giving yourself the time, to literally have your mind open up to the possibilities, that something could be tweaked differently. So how you address a problem, you know, something that a challenge a client has, or in your own business. Sometimes we just need to like, let go. And I have this free of this actually, there's a reminder on my desk, I have a thing that says Let go Let God you see here. Yes, I think sometimes we just have to take a beat and say, Okay, it's like bigger than me right now. I'm just gonna, like, take a moment to like, let it sink in. And, and, you know, and I say, you know, Hey, God, if you can, like, help me out with this, that'd be awesome. You know, and then I just like said, do a little dance, pay a little walk, you know, play with my puppy, maybe get us some coloring book, right? And color something like do something else. So my, our minds reset, and we have just that perspective is gonna go, oh, oh, that's so simple. And the solution just comes or even as I sit in there, the encouraging our friends is reached out to, you know, somebody who is your business bestie or you're somebody using an accountability program with you, or just a good friend that you can talk things out with, and sometimes getting their perspective or just even hearing yourself, say it out loud, gives you a new perspective on how you could address an issue or solve a problem. So I think if we take more of those will be so much more vital. So take that darn bubble bath, right? Go to a movie by yourself, like go do something that's not the doo doo doo, and literally be what we were designed to be which is a human be in and just be

Patty Farmer: 00:29:59

For me Am I really love that? Yeah, you know, several years ago, I was at an event for and they would have the speaker. And then you know, above the speaker is a big event, they had, you know the screen. And then they had these two side screens. And on the side screens, they would have these like running water fountains and all these things on them. And I just really love them. And later on during a break, I said to them, I said, I'm just curious to know, like, why did you do that, because I loved it. It was such so beautiful. Yeah. And they said that when you're at an event, or whenever you're like taking in a lot of information, like you get overwhelmed. Oh, and so what they like to be able to say, and they had some statistic with it, I don't remember this statistic, I just remember the practice of actually being able to say that if you take your eyes off the speaker in the screen for like literally something like 10 seconds, and looked at the other screen and saw the birds and the waterfall or all the different things they had there, that literally it helped to reset you, and ground you so that when you went back, and I was like, wow, that is like super powerful. That isn't right. And so I found that on my desk, you know, I have my big screen monitor, then I have two on the sides. So when I'm working, I actually keep other things on them for that same exact reason. You know, like, on this one over here, I have pictures of my puppies, you know, really like my favorite pictures of my puppies. And then over here, I have all the places that I visited, because I'd love to travel and stuff. And so I really find that when I'm working, it's like, it's almost like really reminds me of why I do and what the other things are that I love. And it works, it really has worked, it's almost like that's my power of the pause.

Mary Barnett: 00:31:46

That means you would have fall under the bed is another brilliant idea right there. And people are nothing else on this bike. As I do that, like I have a screen as well. They usually it's it's like we have my email open that I haven't written, you know, finish writing or whatever it's like, you know, but I love that idea. And I've never seen that an event before. That's brilliant. Wow. Because you know, they say go out for a break, we'll build a sound a lobby, drink coffee and talk to each other. So it's not doing what you're saying. That's really, really smart. I was at an event that they actually had. This is actually the Social Media Marketing World Conference, they had quiet rooms, that people would go in. And there was there was beanbag chairs and soft lighting and sort of people who are more introverted who just needed to go reset their energy. And they have without stretching people, and they're stretching and doing stuff. And I thought, you know, that's really cool, like I am an extrovert. But I do reach a point where as my husband says, light switch on or off, there's a point where, when I'm off, I have to go, like, I literally have no energy even barely to open my eyes and speak. So having that pause that time to go and reset is so important. I'm gonna do that, Patti, I'm gonna put a waterfall or something on there. I, Ella. And as of next week, I have all these beautiful pictures of Italy. So I'll send all those up there.

Patty Farmer: 00:33:07

I don't know, I can't wait till we play Show and Tell together. Right. So that would be so fun. Yay. So I think that when we're doing that, we're kind of resetting that, you know, because really, we, we are so busy in our business, right? And we love to connect and have conversation. I'm an extrovert as well. But I've really learned that I think I can be sometimes both. In my everyday life, I am very extroverted. But when I go to events, specifically, I have learned that the day I come back, if I don't want to get sick, my body will litter I need a down day. Yeah, because what will happen is like when you go to events, or at least when I do, like I'm early, having coffee with as many people as I can and you go to the event all day. And then at nighttime, you're seeing them and then you're planning you know, and then when you get back to the room, like you're thinking of all these other ideas, and then you know one of the things that I do too. So for these for people, this is really a good thing that you could do. Okay, write this down. So you can order them from Amazon. They're like dry, your written I know people have dry erase boards, their dryer ring sheets, they're like eight by 10. You they come 10 in a pack, and I take them with me when I go to events and put them up on the window of my room, they actually sometimes get on the wall depending upon what kind of paint they have always fit on the window. And I will put them up and then all when I come up with those ideas, I go over there with my dry erase pen and I write on them and then I just take it home and that I take it all the events is really really cool because we don't always take them and you know you can write but how often do you write ever? I really love it. And then I just take a picture with my phone, right? Yeah, just take a picture with my phone. But I love writing on there. But what I love to do when I take them is when I meet other people and we have ideas I call this my idea paper. And then when people come I say oh good write your idea down and then they love to write their idea down and I'm like yeah, when we get back we'll have a conversation. I remember what all their idea was in They probably forget. And then when I reach back out to him, I'm like, well hate when we were together and have your coffee, you had this idea. Let's talk about that a year. Now, you know, I am in marketing, and I just can't help because I love hearing marketing stories. Right? That's, that's like, what are you gonna do with that? That's a great idea. Like, right? What are you going to do with that? Right, you know, and stuff there. So for me, I like always have all these little things that I like to do, because you know, how people have like a say, squirrel, you know, the squirrel, and you know, all that kind of stuff. Like for me, I, you know, I have brilliant idea syndrome. I actually even have a journal that says that, you know, it says, Yeah, another brilliant idea. Yes. On it. It actually has the F word in front of it, though. I didn't want to say that on my pockets, but it does. And I thought, oh, my gosh, that's so funny. And that's where I write all like, my ideas in and stuff. So whenever, you know, I'm thinking, Oh, I had that great idea that time, what was that idea? I get so much inspiration from flipping through that. But you go back to something you said, Where wherever we get those ideas. I was on a podcast the other day, and the person. I thought, like, I could do this, but this would be taking it a little too far for me. They actually, are you ready for this? Say that they get their ideas in the shower? Yeah. So they actually put markers, right, and they have them hanging from the ceiling, over their shower. And so when they do they just take those markers and right on the shower wall?

Mary Barnett: 00:36:25

Oh, that's funny. I actually saw an Amazon they have a what you're saying those ideas sheets for the shower. So they knew the water could get on a wall, rinse it off, or whatever. And so you, but you'd have to like rub it off would if you want. But I thought the same thing. I'm like, Oh my gosh, that is another brilliant idea. Because so as you get those inspiration, by the time you get out of the shower, you're ready getting ready, you've already forgotten it. And so like just like they say like if you have a dream, or an idea, you keep a pad next to your bed. You don't write it down right away. It's gone out of your brain, we have so much stuff.

Patty Farmer: 00:36:57

I had a hard time sleeping because of that. And I would try to remember it and so I wouldn't get so sleep. And I finally said Oh, you got to write it down. I actually should put one of those because when I get up to go to the ladies room, I could probably do that. Write it down, and then I could go right back to sleep. So yeah, that's another brilliant idea for myself. There you go. Okay. So I hope everybody's writing down these like brilliant ideas.

Mary Barnett: 00:37:16

These nuggets of brilliant, brilliant. I love it. Yes, yes.

Patty Farmer: 00:37:19

So now let's kind of talk about setting boundaries, and specifically setting boundaries with grace. So you talk about that, too. And I have to tell you, setting boundaries was something that was very difficult for me at one time. But now I feel like, Man, I have totally, that was part of the inner work that I had to do about setting boundaries, I was not very good at it. But now I just do it as part of my onboarding. When I bring on clients and or partners or collaboration partners, whatever the case may be when I'm doing that. Part of that is how do we handle boundaries? Good boy, I gotta tell you people can really really push the boundaries. So how would you that is said boundaries with grace, I have to tell you like, I think that sounds really good. I think we're gonna get some great ones. I hope you guys have a pen and paper because I have a feeling here comes the writer, downers.

Mary Barnett: 00:38:10

The writer downer. It's been the whole show, girl, I'm writing them down from you? Well, I think that one that comes almost a little bit with age. I think that once you get to a certain age that again, not like me, 36. I know, when I hit 34. That's when the brilliant is that I just realized that. You know what? I don't have time for that, you know, there's like, you know, I'm just done after you have so many people pushing those boundaries on you. And if you look at it, I'm always like, how do you spin this to the positive, right? It's not that people are in my brain. They don't, it's not that they're trying to be mean or anything. They just want more of you. And so when people are saying, Can I have more? Can I have more and more? It's just like a little toddler who wants more candy, right? Or more noodles, or whatever it is, right? And so if you think about it, wow, that's like they say imitation is the highest form of flattery, that someone wants to be like you or get more from you or ask you more questions, because they were invested, and they want more of your time or energy or whatever. So when it comes for business, I love that you do it right in your onboarding, because that's the thing is you set your boundaries upfront, like these are the times I'm going to answer you these are the these are the prior, you know, project parameters that you're going to have, then it's so clear, and people know what to expect. And there's no like, Well, you said or I assumed or you know, all that garbage, right, that comes up or whatever. But I think that even in like our personal lives, knowing when to say, No, thank you. Like I have a few chapters in the journal about that few days, I guess you'd say that it's okay to get other people to help you. And I think that that was always a big issue for me is that I felt in fact, I keep a sec talking to my husband because we've been I started the business in 1988. He joined me in 1989. And as men are there, they're problem solvers, right? They can't help themselves like, Oh, you have a problem. I'm going to try to fix it. Awesome. And sometimes as women, we just want to share the problem as our way of kind of, you know, sorting it out. It's like, I just have, you know, and you're like doing all these things, right? They're like, well, here's the solution. I'm like, I don't want that right now. I just, I need to talk it out. I need to like, figure it out or whatever. And I just lost my train of thought. ello because I was, by the way, this is something that I don't know if you ever heard this, but somebody told me why is that men's brains are waffles. And women's brains are spaghetti. Men have literally, have you ever heard that before? Know that men literally have compartments in their brain, work. family home, they have one that's actually called nothing. And I have a lot of guy friends, I've confirmed this every time. Do you really have the ability to think of nothing? You know? And they say, Oh, what do you think about I don't have your router, your husband? And it might as well say nothing? And I'm like, No, really? Like, what are you thinking about? Nothing? How do you do that? Like, how can you think of nothing like that is mind blowing to me? And every man I've ever asked us have the same thing. Yeah. I mean, you literally can turn your brain off and think of nothing. I don't think women we can even comprehend.

Patty Farmer: 00:41:08

I think that is so funny. Because it is like such a stock answer. My husband says that my stock answer when he says where do we want to go eat? And I'll be like, I don't know. I don't care. And he says You always say that. And then I start naming off plays, you know, like, but not there if I'm not there, which is why he says that I always pick the place. He says one of these days I want to open up a restaurant called I don't care, because it will be everybody will come there because that's what their wife always says. All right.

Mary Barnett: 00:41:31

I don't care you pick. Yeah. But then if they pick the wrong one, you're like, No, thank you. Yeah, no, but as but women were spaghetti because we're always thinking of how things are in or lace like, Oh, that reminds me of so and so. Oh, and she was wearing red only have to go buy those red shoes. Oh, and then you know, it's like, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. Right. But that's just the way we think. Right? I thought that was a skill. Oh, yeah. I think again, I think it's a superpower. Actually,

Patty Farmer: 00:41:52

I do too. I that I feel like when a woman has a conversation, that's why when we have a conversation, we can start a conversation and loop it around. And we've talked about our kids and, and business and texting and a book and God and, and and like stories and all this stuff. And first, it makes perfect sense. And we will not miss a beat we will come back and close the lake. Exactly. What about that though? What you're saying though, is because my husband is an engineer? Yes. And I know that I always like to say that he puts everything in the harddrive. And I put everything into RAM. Right? You know about whatever I need to keep I do but and why ever talked about something he can remember every single thing. But for me when he does it, though, one of the things that I find absolutely annoying, but I love him. But this thing can be annoying at times lovingly, is that when I asked him something like now I'm frustrated. I'm like, okay, like, I can't get this to do this. Like, how can we get that to do it? Now, I don't know if your says he will tell me the answer. And then he will say, Oh, and you could also do this. And and you know what else you could do? You could do this. And I really want to say all I want to know is the solution to the thing that I'm overwhelmed. Right now, I don't want to know about all the five other things that I could do. Right? And so that becomes a problem for you. But because like you said, they are fixers, and they want to be able to, to tell us that they can do that with strategy. I have had to learn that, right? Because people talk to me like I don't know, I'm sure marketing, you do this too. But it's like, sometimes people will tell you, I've had to learn to say Are you open to receive, because I realized that just because I come up with the most million dollar marketing strategy for them, and I'm willing to give it to them for free, doesn't mean they want.

Mary Barnett: 00:43:26

That is brilliant. That is brilliant. You're right, because people who have a set thing in their mind, like tying that kind of could an end to the story of that with their husbands like, all with my spaghetti brain. I'm always like, Oh, and this and this. And this, I tell him all the things and he'll say just bottom line it. Can you just tell me how the story ends? And then you could tell me the details. Right? So I think too, with clients, they want the result. And we get sometimes so excited about telling them all the ways that we're gonna get them that result. But they just want the result. Like how are you going to get me to lose 50 panels? Or how are you going to help me get 100 more clients a month or right? Like, I just, I just want that. And the but I personally like it because Hello another brilliant idea. And you are the same way like we have all these things. But if they're not open to other avenues of ways to do things, like my jam is promotions, like, how can we think of like cross promotions and unique promotions and things that make people go or lean in or Oh, like, you know, you want to get the emotion and so I'll be like, Oh my gosh, we're getting this and this and this and this. And they're like, but I need to ask them thank you Patti. That's a such a brilliant idea. Are you open to look at different ways to do it, like,

Patty Farmer: 00:44:42

Seems like it'd be first of all is and then they kind of shift. And just because I have to share the story. One time I was having lunch with this realtor that every I heard her over and over and over again at a networking meeting. Stand up and say I'm a realtor and I wear red shoes and as committed as I am to wearing the Use red shoes every day. That's how committed I am to help you sell your home. And I thought, okay, I know that's what I thought too. Okay. So because I'm in marketing, so we're sitting having coffee. And this was before I learned to ask. I said to her, I said, I got this great idea for you. And she's like, what? I said, Well, you don't feel like we're in the networking and you tell that story, and stuff. And she says, Yes, I said, Have you ever thought when you're standing up telling that story, to click your heels and say, because there's no place like home?

Mary Barnett: 00:45:28

Yes, your realtor?

Patty Farmer: 00:45:31

Your realtor, because there's no place like home. So when you're talking about your red shoes, just say I wear red shoes every day, because there's no place like home. Nobody will ever forget you though. Nobody will ever forget that. So here's my market. I know you can have it for free. And she looked me in the face is that no, that's okay. I don't want it. I'm not kidding you. I'm not kidding you. She said that to me. And I was like, in my head. I was like, really? And I said, Oh, that's okay. I'll find another realtor that will love it. Right. But I couldn't buy that. Oh, my God, that's what I learned, I should say, first and say, Are you open to receive because sometimes they just are not. And then that's okay. But I think that you and I, because we get excited and like I want to serve and I want to help someone in and stuff. And I want to be able to say, you know, whatever. But I totally get that. Because when I'm telling my husband something, I learned that before I tell him sometimes I'll say I'm not asking you to fix it. I just want to, I'm just sharing. I'm dietary and just share it that way. And then when I'm done telling the story, he'll say, Do you need help with that? I'm like, No, I got the answer. Now sometimes, I mean, thinking it out loud when I'm sharing the story, as it turned might get to the end of the story. I already know what I'm going to do I already have the answer. I just needed to say it out loud.

Mary Barnett: 00:46:47

It's our spaghetti brains. That's just how we work things. I love that love that. In fact, it's funny when you said that sometimes telling people so I did this tic tock. That was a joke about you know, he had this thing where the sound was basically covering your mouth like, oh, but this because I find myself even in grocery store lines. Like somebody will say something like, oh, have you ever thought about bla bla bla bla, you know, and they're like, hi, lady, who are you? Like? That's like, I'm also reading charts. Yes, they're complaining about something with somebody in front of me. And I'm like, Oh, here's the idea for you. Here you go. Like, wow, what, and my kids always say, Mom, stop leaving money on the table, my mother would always say you need to charge more like, I have these little voices in my head. And again, this is a PGA show, so I won't share this. But I guess there's a place that you can sell pictures of your feet. And my kids are always joking with me. That Mom, you're always leaving money on the table, because you always videotape your feet when you're walking along. You know, like in the beach, or like I'm going for a hike or I'm at an event because I think it's funny you like on your feet and then you zoom up and show like where you are. I just think it's a cool transition. And they're like, Mom, you could be selling those feet pics.

Patty Farmer: 00:47:55

That is so funny. One time I was up in Colorado, I will never forget this. I was in Colorado visiting my friend Eva. And I went to this National Speakers Association party, they were having like a kind of a get together. And I just happened to be visiting. And so I went in to go to the restroom, and I'm in the restroom. And these two girls washed our outside. They're washing their hands and they're having a conversation like women do that they're having conversation. And I'm listening to the conversation while I'm in the restroom. And then I get up and I come out and now I'm washing my hands. And they're still talking and I thought for a second and then I was like, Oh, what the heck. And so I turned around and I said are you looking for a solution to that? Because I can tell you how you can fix that problem. Didn't mean to overhear but er the bathroom and stuff. And they're like, really? And I said yes. Anyway, I close a $10 deal in that restroom. Like when dollar deal. $10,000 definitely literally took her credit card out. And like hired me for $10,000 Are you serious? I absolutely am. Eva loves to tell the story. Because what I came out with, like, where do you begin? I said, Well, I just close this $10,000 deal on the bathroom. She's like, what? And I'm like, Well, I didn't plan on doing it. But then the girl started telling me your thing on that. Oh, yeah, she's like, Well, how would you help me fix it? And then I kind of told her, she's like, Oh my gosh, you're iron. Like, I'm kidding. I'm not kidding. Like, that literally,

Mary Barnett: 00:49:08

Is amazing. Oh my gosh.

Patty Farmer: 00:49:12

It's almost like so it's just kind of funny. But I think that sometimes when you when you are looking to serve, I mean, I know that I tell I actually teach my clients this. So when you're sitting next to somebody, and you're at a thing, right, you're out of things, or and somebody's selling something. And then they're saying, Oh, yes, you could, you know, do my thing for you know, $5,000 whatever, right? And sometimes the person next to you people are talking and and they'll say, Oh, I really think that would be really, really great to do but I'm not there yet. Like I'm not there yet. I can't afford to, to do that yet, or whatever. And I'm like, Well, what was the thing that you love the most? You know, what is the one thing that you love the most? Right? And then they'll say, Oh, well, the one thing that I love the most is that I'm like, Oh, I could help you with that. And they're like, Well, how much would that cost? And I always say I always tell my clients, this is the number. So this is kind of a thing. I tell them $900. And they're like, What do you say? 900. I was like, because it's less than 1000. It's less than 1000. I can't even tell you how many deals I'd close and my clients, hundreds and hundreds of them, where I've taught them, we'll just do the one thing, they just asked for the one thing, right to charge the $900. And then, oh, well, what's the next thing, and then if you can help them with the next thing to do, and then pretty soon, you know, like, you're helping them with whatever, but you've proven yourself there, they couldn't do the thing. So I'm not saying you should go to other people's events and take their clients. I am not saying that's already been really, really clear. But I have been in the hallway, in restrooms, whatever, where people just have conversations, and they're just like, Oh, I really just want to know how to do this. I wish I could just do that. Nobody ever says that when somebody says, Oh, I can help you with that. Wow, you just have to say I can help you with that. That's just the sentence.

Mary Barnett: 00:50:52

I love that. And I love thank you for that reminder, you guys need to write that down. If you haven't done it. Like, I think sometimes we and I'm very guilty of this is I want to do all the things because I know that's what's best for them. I know that if they have all these pieces in place, they'll be much more successful faster. But you're right. People aren't always ready for all the things, right. But if you just give them the one thing they really want, they're going to realize or then they'll be open to Oh, wow. If I had the other thing too, like that even be better easier. I can automate this. And that goes a long thing. Now we're ready to do then. Yeah. So next one is absolutely brilliant. Patti. I hope everyone has written that down because it's true. And I and I have lost deals because I've been wanting to do all the things and it's this giant price tag. But you're right.

Patty Farmer: 00:51:42

There's many things like they can't they are overwhelmed by those things. While I pick one,

Mary Barnett: 00:51:47

There's a low and overwhelmed. Thank you. Thank you for telling you bad like, seriously, that's so true. And I think when you provide that one thing for someone, you're giving them more joy, because you're you solve that problem for them. And they're like, oh, that's one thing off my list. And then another thing and another thing, right? So you're bringing, you're making them leave, you're leaving them better than you found them right. You're helping them be more successful in many levels, not just money, but also peace of mind in knowing their business is going to continue creating a legacy for their family. Like there's so many levels we haven't even talked I know we're probably at the end of our time, but wow, wow, Patti, you are a rockstar. Love it.

Patty Farmer: 00:52:32

Thank you so much. Okay, now to get back to look at you.

Mary Barnett: 00:52:37

Afflicting deflecting. Oh, please. Yes, you are everyone listening.

Patty Farmer: 00:52:41

This isn't the solo podcast, though. So I really want to be like, so let's get back to that. So let's talk about rediscovering your words beyond work at a joy of being overdoing. Hey, these are your words. I'm just I know.

Mary Barnett: 00:52:55

You're working out again. It's early. I'm in California coffee. Warming California, you are two hours ahead of me.

Patty Farmer: 00:53:03

We're thinking about Italy, right? We've got Italy

Mary Barnett: 00:53:05

Are that to be honest, I have my whole I have a table set up in my room with all my luggage. Like, I used to live. I put all my toiletries out like I'm trying to figure out like how to fit everything in a smaller package. Yes. So yeah, my brain is there. And I have another I'm running a live stream for one of the services we provide is I do like kind of like this for clients on I interview them on their own show. And then I like go off screen so I can repurpose their piece of it anyways, it's just something fun. And so I have that in 45 minutes. When that is a so well. Yeah, well,

Patty Farmer: 00:53:35

They miss so much. I'm loving it so much. Okay. Just kind of being overdoing.

Mary Barnett: 00:53:40

Yes. So the joy is not the overdoing. Right. The Joey is is finding when you can let go of things right. So we all have gifts, and we should focus on it. So I don't know if you've ever read or any of your listeners have read the book? Strength Finders, 2.0? Of course, he has of course you Yes. Oh, that's right. I think we talked about it. And so basically, it's honing in on what you do best. And the encouragement in that book is that you lean into your strengths, do what you do well, what you are gifted with. And then what you don't do well, you find a team member or someone else in your life to do those things, right. And so, as women, we're always thinking that we need to do all the things, you know, oh, no, it's okay. I'll take on that too. I'll do that too. I'll do that too. And it's so easy to do in business and my husband actually, when I'm doing that he says you know, is Yes, dear moment. They'll say, Oh, I'm sorry. Is this the marry show? And I'm like, okay, because he's saying that because I am taking in all the things Oh, is it easier if I do it myself? Because I've done it a million times instead of explaining it to someone. I'll just do it myself be easier and faster. Well, guess what? That's not scalable. And so with my VAs what I ended up doing and here's a tip is that I literally turn on a loom video on i which is like a skirt mean casting video that you can screencast what you're doing, and I live will record all the steps I take to do something that I do without thinking about it, like sending an email or creating a graphic or whatever it is that I'm working on, right things that are more rudimentary, not something that takes my expertise brain to do, because that's not something that's my gifting. But something that someone can do. That's more administrative. It's not really my, my gift. So but because I've done it for so many years, and I've always like, I'm very particular, I like things done a certain way. I've been doing that more and more as I record the loom, and then I sent it off, and you could literally see on loom, if someone's watched it, and how much it was. Oh, love that. Yeah. So I'll actually do it for clients too. I'm like, Oh, here's what I need you to do. And, and if they're like, why don't get out to do it. I said, Well, you haven't watched the video yet. And they're like, Oh,

Patty Farmer: 00:55:54

Wow. So much, right? And that's a little accountability misusing that. I use that loon Juba. Literally, I actually have reversed that. But I think I like this way better. Because I have my VAs and my team. I have them create the SOPs, right. You know, I'm like, Yes, good. Now, when we talked you did it. Good. Now create an SOP for it. Right. Right. You know, when we have a whole folder, just follow those SOPs. Right. And I think that that is really important. Right. Wow. I love that. I, I love that a lot. Yeah. Okay, so here's what I'm gonna say. Yeah. What is one piece of advice that you'd give to someone if they're starting their 31 day journey from overwhelmed to overjoyed? So based on your experiences and insights and book? What's the piece of advice you'd give to someone when they're first starting?

Mary Barnett: 00:56:43

When it comes to my book, not my business, write the book? Yes. Okay. Sure. I Oh, actually,

Patty Farmer: 00:56:48

You can get it both answers, like one is like, your 31 day journey, but they're going from overwhelmed to overjoyed. So whether they're applying that to the book, you're applying it to their business, whatever the case may be in, those are separate answers.

Mary Barnett: 00:57:00

That's fine. Sure, sure. I just know what you're talking about a tip at the end. So when it comes to that is one give yourself grace. Because a lot of times we start any project, but instead of it like a journal or, or, you know, daily, go for a walk schedule, or you know, something, you're saying, I'm gonna commit to doing this. And then after, you know, life happens, and after a few days, you don't do it that one day or you miss a three or four days, like going to the gym, right? I think we beat ourselves up. And we're, we beat ourselves to the point where we think well, we'll never do that, oh, we'll never do that. So we will wave and try, right? And no, it's like, it's okay. Life does happen, right? They say should not be mushrooms happen. And when things come up like that, you have to give yourself grace to say it's okay, I'll start again. And so this 31 Day journal a lot of times even myself, like, I'll say all I'm gonna go through it myself. I have like author's copies. And so I'll go through myself. And I'll miss a whole week and go, Oh, yeah, I'm so sorry. It's okay to start back again, to redo it, because we're, we're all in, what do you call it? We're all in process. We're all beings, right? So we're always improving, and we slip back, and that's okay. And we shouldn't beat ourselves up about that.

Patty Farmer: 00:58:15

We're gonna be different places all the time to that's like my Jesus Calling book. I don't know if you have that book, Jesus. Yeah. A lot. So that Jesus Calling book I love it, because like, you know, where I am today. And then I just keep starting over again. And then like, it's always amazing to me how I'm in a different place. And I get something out of it every single time. And I've never once thought, Oh, I get this. Right.

Mary Barnett: 00:58:34

I know I have I read a book. That's, it is a faith based thing as well. It's a devotional, but it's only for work. So it's five. So it's Monday through Friday, and it's called word before work by Jordan Reiner. And it's all devotionals devoted to the work we do. And so I only read it Monday through Friday. I don't have to worry about it on the weekend. Like it's like just something I read. It takes three minutes read it, it's like, oh, cool. Like, he's the master creator. We are made in His image. So we are creators. And so our job is to use our gifts to create something amazing, right? And so I mean, it goes much deeper than that. But I think that that's the lesson in the 31 days from overwhelmed overjoyed is you're always providing a transformation to someone in your the book is that for someone personally, but also in our work. And so tying it your work is that what is it in your business that you can help someone transform to be right if you're a housecleaner, you're transforming their house from dirty to clean. If you're helping a weight loss coach, you're helping someone go from unhealthy to healthy or bad to thin or whatever. What is that transformation? So in marketing, I'm always telling that to my clients is focus on what's important to them. It's not about you in your marketing sharp, it's about them your clients. So how are you going to help them get from unhappy to happy stressed to Jover joy, like Chris ate that, that messaging that's going to help them see by working with you, you're going to make their lives better. So wow, that's priceless, right? If I talk to you, you're gonna make me make my list better or that better whatever, right? Because if it's not why hire you recall?

Patty Farmer: 01:00:19

I know because I think that so many times and I see this a lot in service based businesses, where they just feel like oh, no, I need to give you more information, I need to give you more information, you give me more information and

Mary Barnett: 01:00:30

Overwhelm your client. Overwhelming. Right?

Patty Farmer: 01:00:32

And I always like to say all the time Google's in the information business, I'm in the transformation business, right,

Mary Barnett: 01:00:37

You know, love that.

Patty Farmer: 01:00:39

So let's like be really clear what it is that we're doing. Right? You know, because they could buy another book, see another this get another that right, whatever, like, but why do they need me? Well, because that's not the business that I'm in. I'm not only love that business, I'm in the transformation. So I think that is really important. So since we're talking about that, that's kind of a good way right here. So the segue. Yes. So this is the marketing media money podcast. So this is the portion of the show that I like to call hashtag open mic, where I want to ask you, what is the you had to narrow down? What is the number one marketing media or money strategy?

Mary Barnett: 01:01:16

Like, what would it be? Yes, well, we haven't talked a lot about it this in detail, but it comes back to bite by software. The reason I'm called Mobile, Mary, is that I own text marketing software that you alluded to earlier called brilliant mobile.com. And it helps all kinds of businesses, I work with military to mom, and pops, restaurants, retail schools, all that kind of thing. And I always say that since we don't own our social media, it's really important that we own our own database of customers, right? Because it's provides two benefits. One, it's business insurance. So if you like, or building your whole business on social media, and it goes down, or you get kicked off, or something happens, poof, your business is gone. So always give a way to get people offline by offering them a way to connect with you download a digital download for your email, I love texts, of course, hello, mobile, Mary. So because people read text, 95% 94%, instant open rate, but it gives you that insurance, but it also if you ever thinking of selling your business, it's also a business asset. So if you're gonna sell your business tomorrow, and you could say, I've got all these wonderful things, and a list of 5000 active customers who who respond and instantly because I'm literally in the palm of their hand, when do you think your business might be worth a little bit more money with that asset. So I'm always saying, don't just build it for you know how to talk today, think about the future of that business asset, and you have that business insurance. So that would be my tip is make sure that you're building a list offline that you own. So you are in control, because no one is the boss of you.

Patty Farmer: 01:02:58

I know I love that. And really, when you're thinking about another brilliant idea, I didn't really need to tie those things back in there. It is less overwhelm, and stuff when you could just tell somebody to text, right? You know, I mean, that's so easy we're doing and I mean, you can do it from the stage, you can put it, you know, I mean, like when you're speaking, it doesn't matter what you're doing. It's really, really easy at the end of a podcast, just to be able to say, oh, gets this right, you know, in fact,

Mary Barnett: 01:03:20

I'm going to do that. Yeah, as I say, all because I'm all about fun, all about fun, I want you to text the word fun. And I'm going to give you my long code, because right now that I'm shortcodes are kind of having an issue with carrier. So I don't know when people are gonna listen to this. So my long code is actually my office number which both takes phone calls and receives textbook of our software. So I always tell people, you can call or text My office number, which is 89518983727. Again, 951-898-3727. And yours is going to to that number, instead of say bringing on my screen, which I typically text my husband, you're going to text it and we're going to type in just the word fun. And when you do that, you'll get instantly back a link to the texting success tips or what I call it, but he's basically really way that you don't have to use our system you can use it with any text system is how to communicate with your customers more effectively, and get them to you're nurturing the relationship. So at the end of the day, they'll buy what you have because you can transform their lives with your with your business.

Patty Farmer: 01:04:23

That is so awesome. Mary, thank you so much. And since you gave everybody your texting so they know how to do that. Another brilliant idea.com Is that

Mary Barnett: 01:04:33

Website yet another brilliant idea. Everyone needs another brilliant idea. Right?

Patty Farmer: 01:04:38

So wish I thought of that first? Yes, I really do

Mary Barnett: 01:04:41

Invest together you'll just be a part of that love. It's all good girl.

Patty Farmer: 01:04:45

Okay, well, I know it because you know everything for me is with light bulbs and joy. You know, I mean, like literally, you and I were like we have the same name every day. You know Cena. I love it. Just love it. Okay, thank you so much. For me,

Mary Barnett: 01:05:00

I appreciate it. And I love you in Italy next week, girl.

Patty Farmer: 01:05:03

I know right? To the audience. Thank you so much for spending this time with us today. I know it had to been fun. I know it had to been fun.

Mary Barnett: 01:05:13

And joy. Yes.

Patty Farmer: 01:05:15

And for what joy and was a really good idea for you to tune in a brilliant idea for you to tune in. So yeah, we've got to decide all that together. It's a bit of a way. Yes. So please like subscribe and review the podcast on your favorite listening channel and make sure that you grab the magazine as well. So if you already have our magazine, Marketing Media Money, feel free to go to www.m3magazine.com how I did that marketing making money in www.m3magazine.com. Grab Your Free Copy they are so whether you'd like to read or listen, we've got you covered. So thank you so much for being here with me. We'll see you again next week. Have a phenomenal week.